Assignment 2

Welp, what a week. It's been good, real good. I'm learning things. I'm learning how little it is that I know. Truly. But that's okay.  It's seemed to be this similar downward spiral for sometime now. I'm not shocked by my slips while trying to claw myself to safety...rather I'm sliding. Right on down. a sick pleasant smile on my lips. I don't even bother with... things. I'm going. I'm being. Cause life has never waited on me.It's not supposed to really. I'm not made to dawdle, or sit behind on the curb as it beckons me come.  But I'm behind and that's the situation I'm in and I'm not for certain how to leap from here to there. It's not so simple as just doing. It's a mysterious maze between here and there. And though I'd like to be lifted and placed from here to there, it cannot be, for there is no thing with which to move me. It is not. So I am here, and I should be there. I am lost and searching is fruitless. There is no clue. I don't know what they mean anymore. And so I stare. A lifeless glaze. This character has no story, no life, no background, no attachment to my heart, as the reader. I can't recognize her. Not I don't-I can't.
____________________________________________________
Above is the line where I left for class-Marriage and Family Planning-and left my dear writing to appease my professor, other students, and most importantly the attendance standard. I'm always grateful when I go.  We talked much of "love in action", which has always been the definition by which my name has been defined to me, and rather then labeling such "charity" we labeled it grace.  But we still had a separate definition of the term.  We called grace "unmerited favour". Interesting, I'm quite accustomed to the particular definition but had never internalized such significance.  Favour. a favourite of mine. For someone to favour me is strong and means much to my particular being. I desire to be favoured I do believe.  I want to be preferred. Such is my inner being. But to be desired and wanted when circumstance and reason dictate otherwise is a powerful powerful thing I do believe. Any woman wants that. Perhaps even every woman... but at least any.  It seems my notion is deeper than I, and attached to my gender-my biology- not my deepest feelings, not me particular. That all doesn't matter though. I no longer desire to write on this topic perhaps I shall conclude my thought (or rather develope it) at some later time. But perhaps, and mostly likely not, as well. Good day, Fairwell, So long, Today.:)
Journal entry length:Complete.